What do you do with your leftovers?

This time of year, between Thanksgiving and New Year, there is always a lot of talk about leftovers. There are all kinds of segments on television and articles on social media about creative ways to use your leftover turkey, stuffing, and cranberry sauce. Families divide up the leftover food from their holiday meals and eat on them for days to come. And sometimes leftovers are taken and given to those in need, who may not have been able to enjoy a nice meal for the holiday. I love this idea! Our leftovers can be a blessing to someone else!

 

Yesterday, I was reading a very familiar story in John 6, where Jesus feeds the 5,000. I've read it and heard it told so many times, I kind of just tune it out sometimes because I know what's coming. Jesus gets a lunch from a little boy that has two fish and five loaves. He tells the people to sit down, then passes out food to everyone. It shouldn't be enough, but somehow it stretches to fill them all. Then, to show that He gave them more than enough, He has the disciples collect the leftovers in baskets. Sound about right?

 

But, I want you to read the story again, really read it, and pay attention especially to verse 12.

 

John 6:1-13 Some time after this, Jesus crossed to the far shore of the Sea of Galilee (that is, the Sea of Tiberias), ² and a great crowd of people followed him because they saw the signs he had performed by healing the sick. ³ Then Jesus went up on a mountainside and sat down with his disciples. ⁴ The Jewish Passover Festival was near.

⁵ When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, “Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?” ⁶ He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do.

⁷ Philip answered him, “It would take more than half a year’s wages^[a] to buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!”

⁸ Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up, ⁹ “Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?”

¹⁰ Jesus said, “Have the people sit down.” There was plenty of grass in that place, and they sat down (about five thousand men were there). ¹¹ Jesus then took the loaves, gave thanks, and distributed to those who were seated as much as they wanted. He did the same with the fish.

¹² When they had all had enough to eat, he said to his disciples, “Gather the pieces that are left over. Let nothing be wasted.” ¹³ So they gathered them and filled twelve baskets with the pieces of the five barley loaves left over by those who had eaten.

 

In verse 12, Jesus says, "Let nothing be wasted." I'm sure I have read that before, but yesterday, it jumped off the page at me and got into my brain.

 

Don't you love when God does that with a piece of scripture?

 

The more I thought about it, the more I wondered, what did they do with the leftovers?

 

This miracle is recorded in all four of the Gospels, but only John records this statement. So, as far as I know, the Bible doesn't tell us what Jesus did with the leftovers, specifically. I can only guess. But what it DOES tell me, is that the leftovers were used for SOMETHING. They had a purpose.

 

I've always heard the lesson in this story to be that Jesus provided over and above what the people needed. He met all of their needs AND provided extra, just to make sure. And this is true. He did do that. But, He didn't just give them extra and then allow them to discard the leftovers on the ground to be carried away by animals or pile them in a garbage heap somewhere to rot. He gathered them up so that He could extend this miracle into a blessing somewhere else.

 

Did the people divide up the leftovers and take them home to combine with other things and make a whole new meal for later? Did the disciples keep the leftovers to eat later when they didn't have easy access to food? Did they take the leftovers into town and share them with the widows and orphans? I don't know. And really, it's not important. The point is that Jesus desires for the things He gives us to never be wasted. He has a plan and a purpose for everything He blesses us with that goes beyond the immediate circumstances.

 

So, what are you doing with your leftovers?

 

Maybe your leftovers literally are the extra food that your family doesn't eat during the meal, like in this story. Do you save it to have later, stretching the money God has provided your family for food? Do you invite others to share the meal with you or take the extra to someone who needs it? OR do you put it in a plastic container in the back of the fridge until it's unrecognizable and you have to throw it out?

 

But maybe your leftovers are something else.

 

Maybe you have extra in your finances. Maybe you have extra time (if so, lend me some!). A talent or ability? Knowledge?

 

Whatever it is, God has a purpose for it. Ask Him to show you how to use the extra He has given you to be a blessing somewhere else.

 

 

 

 

The calm AFTER the storm

If you have children, you know that when things get really quiet in the house, it usually means one of two things; either the children are asleep, or they are doing something they aren't supposed to do. When I can see or at least hear my kids, I don't really worry too much because I know what's going on. But when they are out of sight or being too quiet, my heart starts to beat a little faster as I run scenarios through my mind of what they might be doing and what I'm going to discover when I find them. Quiet at my house usually means that trouble is approaching.

 

I've applied this same mind-set to other areas of my life as well. When things in my life are going well, when there is calm and peace, I don't enjoy it because I am just waiting for the bottom to drop out and the storm to come.  I always see the good times as "the calm BEFORE the storm."

 

But this isn't the way the God intends for me to live my life. Yes, storms are going to come into my life.

 

My kids ARE going to make choices I wish they wouldn't.

 

People ARE going to get sick or hurt or pass away.

 

My husband, friends, family, coworkers, etc ARE going to disappoint me.

 

Unexpected bills and financial issues ARE going to come.

 

God never said He would take our storms away. He promised that He would be with us through  the storms and that eventually the storms will pass. And when they do, He brings us peace.

 

I read a scripture today that spoke to my heart. Acts 9:31 says

 

Then the church throughout Judea, Galilee, and Samaria enjoyed a time of peace. It was strengthened and encouraged by the Holy Spirit, it grew in number, living in the fear of the Lord.

(emphasis mine)

 

The church had come through a time of persecution and suffering, a storm. But God was with them through all of that and brought them to the other side, to a time of peace. Instead of spending this time worrying about when the next storm was coming or how bad it was going to be, they enjoyed their time of peace. They didn't let fear of the future steal their joy of the moment they were in.

 

Back to those children I was talking about at the beginning...

  Children come into our lives in a storm. Whether natural, C-section, full term, premature, scheduled, or spontaneous, childbirth always bring with it an element of the unknown, of fear, of a lack of control. Like a storm. As that storms rolls through, the intensity increases, hearts beat faster, and things happen quickly. It is unstoppable.

 

But suddenly, that little baby is born and the storm begins to calm. You hear that tiny cry and relief washes over you. Then they hand you that sweet little one wrapped up all snug and warm in a blanket. You take your baby in your arms and it looks up at you with those wide, trusting eyes, and a calm and peace floods your soul.

In those precious moments, your mind isn't thinking about the coming storms-the baby's first illness, potty training, paying for college-you're too busy counting fingers and toes and looking in wonder at the amazing gift you've been given. In that moment after the storm, you enjoy the time of peace.

This is the way I need to look at the storms in my life. Not shading my eyes from the sunlight, anticipating the approaching storm, but standing strong through the storm, anticipating the sunlight. When I view life from this perspective, I can enjoy the sunlight when it comes, basking in it's glow and soaking up the warmth of the light.

I am no longer afraid of the calm BEFORE the storm, because I am learning to live in the calm that comes AFTER the storm.

 

 

A Whole New World

I love Disney princess movies. I grew up watching sweet movies like Beauty and the Beast, The Little Mermaid, and Aladdin. I think my favorite part of any princess movie has to be the music. Even as an adult, I have been known to randomly burst into a Disney song when the mood hits. I love it! As I type this post, I am listening to Disney Radio on Pandora.

 

I love the song "A Whole New World" from the movie Aladdin. Just before the song begins, Aladdin, disguised as Prince Ali, flies up on his magic carpet to the balcony where Princess Jasmine is standing with her pet Tiger (how cool would it be to have a pet tiger?!) He asks her if she'd like to go for a ride on his magic carpet. She asks him, "Is it safe?"

Aladdin reaches down his hand to Jasmine and replies, "Sure. Do you trust me?" At that moment, Jasmine recognizes Aladdin for who he really is, although she doesn't reveal it just yet. So, she agrees to go on a magic carpet ride with him.

 

Through the song, Aladdin and Jasmine fly through the sky over the city and have an amazing adventure. They soar through clouds and up to the stars. They fly with birds and among a herd of running horses as the song sweetly tells of how Aladdin can open her eyes to a whole new world she's never known before.

 

But, what if she hadn't recognized him? Would she have trusted him and gone off on a magic carpet ride with him? I don't know how the story would have turned out if Jasmine hadn't known who Aladdin was, but I'm pretty sure she would have missed out on that amazing adventure through the clouds.

 

Over the past few days, I've noticed a theme that keeps popping up in the scriptures I'm studying and the books I'm reading, things I've been seeing on social media, and conversations I've been having with friends. Even my own blog posts this week have had a common topic-GO. And not just to go, but to go without knowing where the path is leading.

 

I know that God is asking to me step out and do some things that take me out of my comfort zone. I can see on the horizon opportunities that He is placing before me to step into the calling and the purpose He has planned for me. But I hesitate. I hold back because I can't see where it's going to lead. I can see the next steps, but I can't see the end of road.

 

But, I know He's standing there, like Aladdin on his magic carpet, holding out his hand and asking me, "Do you trust me?" He's waiting for me to recognize Him for who He is, take his hand, a let Him take me on an adventure. All I have to do is say yes.

 

There's a story in Acts of someone God called to "go" without revealing where the path was going to lead. Acts chapter 9 tells the story of Saul's conversion. Read it, it's a cool story.

The verse that stands out to me as I think about being called to go is Acts 9:6. It says,

"Now get up and go into the city and you will be told what you must do."

 

God didn't give Saul/Paul an itinerary for the way his life was going to change and the journey he was  going to be on for the rest of his life. He didn't sit Saul down and tell him the game plan before he put him into the game. Saul was told to "go" first and then he would be told what to do. He did and he was.

Heavenly Father,
Help me, Lord, to be willing to get up and go when you call me. Forgive me for the times I have hesitated and held back out of my desire to be in control. I want to trust you to lead me even when I can't see where the path is leading. Show me the next step to take and give the courage to take it. I know you will not let me fall!
Amen

Go where they are!

I remember when my kids were little; when I had two toddlers, a preschooler, and an elementary child. Four little ones under the age of 10. Back then, every time I turned around, there was a child underfoot. They always wanted to be where I was, doing what I was doing. Rarely did they get far from my sight.

The older they have gotten, though, the further away they have begun to venture. I now have two teenagers, a middle schooler, and an older elementary child. It’s not unusual, even when we’re all home together, for us to all be in different places. I’ll be in my bedroom studying, one child will be working at the kitchen table, one in the living room on the couch, one in their bedroom, and one outside.

Our house isn’t huge, but when we all get separated into our different spaces, talking to one another is an issue. If I’m in the kitchen and Cheyenne is in her bedroom playing her guitar, there is no way she’s going to hear me calling her for schoolwork. Having an intercom in my house would be so handy! But since we don’t, I use the next best thing-the other children. I have four walking talking intercoms at my disposal.

So, I’ll say to one of my children, “Go tell Cheyenne it’s time for her to do Language Arts,” thinking that will save me some steps and I can have a couple extra seconds to throw in some laundry or put some things in the dishwasher. But, somehow, my children always misinterpret what I said. They miss one key word-GO!

Instead of walking down the hallway to the bedroom, opening the door, and calmly giving my message, the child will stand right next to me, without moving a single step, and yell, “CHEYENNE!!!! MOM SAID TO COME DO LANGUAGE ARTS!”

Nice.

And my reply to them is always the same, “There’s no way she’s going to hear you from here. If you need to tell Cheyenne something, go to where she is.”

As Christians, I think we tend to do this a lot in trying to get the Gospel message out to the people who need to hear it. We spend week after week standing in our church auditoriums yelling out “Hey, Jesus loves you and wants to be your Savior.” Our message is exactly what they need to hear. But they can’t hear it…because they aren’t there. They aren’t coming to us.

If we want to reach people outside the church with the message of the Gospel and show them the love of Jesus, we are going to have to go to where they are. It may be at work or at the grocery store or your child’s soccer game. It may be that you talk with them at the park while the kids are playing or as you wait at dance class with the other moms.

It reminds me of the story of Philip and the Ethiopian in Acts chapter 8. Acts 8:29-30 says,

The Spirit told Phillip, ‘Go to that chariot and stay near it.’ Then Phillip ran up to the chariot and heard the man reading Isaiah the prophet. ‘Do you understand what you are reading?’ Phillip asked.

Phillip didn’t wait for the man to come to him. Phillip went to where the man was. If you continue reading the story, the Ethiopian man asked Phillip about a passage of scripture he didn’t understand and Phillip was able to explain the Gospel to him. The man believed and was baptized.

But it didn’t happen because Phillip stood at a distance yelling the message at the man. It happened because Phillip WENT to him.

Father,

Help me to see the opportunities you put in front of me to not just stand back and wait for someone to come to me to hear about you, but to GO to where they are. I know there are people around me all the time who need to hear about you who may never come into my church or come up and ask me. Help me to see them. Help me to be willing to step out of my comfort zone and meet them where they are. I don’t want to stand back and yell at people from a distance, I want to share your love with them up close. Give me the wisdom and the courage to allow you to lead me to the people who need to hear.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen

The Puzzle

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it here or not, but I am an only child. Growing up, it was just my dad, my mom, and me. From the time I was in about 4^th grade on, we lived on a busy street in a neighborhood where there weren’t very many other kids. The closest friend lived about 3 blocks away. Both of my parents worked, so after school, I stayed home by myself for a couple of hours until they came home during the school year and all day most days in the summer. I spent a lot of time by myself.

I’m not at all saying this was necessarily a bad thing. It had its pros and cons. One of the good things that came from being left alone a lot is that I learned to entertain myself. Those were the days before cell phones and internet access, so I actually had to find things to do on my own. I did watch TV some and play video games some (Super Mario anyone?). But more often than that, I did other things. I listened to music a lot (on cassette tapes), I read, I wrote, I played with my toys, and I made up games to play. I knew several different versions of solitaire and even invented ways to play Monopoly and Battleship by myself (I always won!).

Something I have always enjoyed doing when I have time to spend by myself is jigsaw puzzles. I love starting with a bunch of pieces that look like nothing on their own and putting them all together to make a big finished picture. I love the way each piece has to fit in a certain place and if you get something in the wrong spot, the whole puzzle won’t work. I love when there is a missing piece and I have to try several different ones that look like they might fit before I find the right one. I love the excitement of the feeling when you finally find the right piece and it just clicks right into place and fits perfectly.

Over the years, I’ve had the chance to teach lots of kids about doing puzzles, my own kids and students I had when I was teaching. I like that the procedure is the same-sort the “edge” pieces from the “inside” pieces, put together the outside frame of the puzzle, then fill in the middle. If you don’t sort the pieces first, you waste a lot of time digging through to find the edge pieces. Trying to start in the middle is much harder because you don’t have the perimeter to go by the make sure you stay within the boundaries of the picture. It works much better if you do it in order.

Another thing that is very helpful to me when I’m trying to figure out if I have the pieces in the right places is the box. Almost all puzzles come in a box that has the complete picture on the front. If not, then they usually have a paper inside the box with the picture on it. That way, you can look at the piece in your hand, compare all the little details on it with the example picture and see better where it fits into the big picture. Often I will use the picture to help me sort the inside pieces by their coloration to make it even easier to see where they fit.

Sometimes, I really wish God would give me the box for the puzzle of my life. If only I could see how everything was going to play out, making decisions would be so much easier. I would know for sure whether I put each piece in the right place. I could compare the choice I was about to make with the big picture and see whether or not it fit. I wouldn’t have to fear making the wrong choice or moving in the wrong direction. I would know where I was going and what it was going to look like when I got there.

But that’s not the way He does it. God doesn’t show me the whole picture. He gives me just a piece at a time. I think He does this partly because if I saw what was coming in the future, it would scare me to death. If I could see the hard things that were ahead of me, I wouldn’t want to move forward and go through them, even though they are necessary to get me to where I need to be.

 

I was reading in Hebrews 11 yesterday. It’s about faith. The chapter goes through a list of people of faith-Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, and others. When I got to the part about Abraham, there was a verse that stuck out to me and got me thinking about puzzles.

 

Hebrews 11:8 says,

“By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going.”

That last part is where it really hit me. Abraham obeyed and went even though he didn’t know where he was going. God didn’t reveal the whole picture to Abraham. He only gave him one piece. He told him to GO. And Abraham went. Not seeing how this piece fit into the end result, but trusting that it did.

Too many times in my life, God tells me to do something, to take a step, to put in a piece of the puzzle, but I resist. I want to know why and how it all fits. I want to see what’s coming after this step. I want to see how the picture is going to look at the end before I start to put it together.

But He’s asking me to trust. He wants me to step out and be obedient to what He’s asking me to do, one step at a time, without knowing what’s ahead. That’s called faith. I have to move ahead into what He’s calling me to do and trust that He will make the pieces fit.

Because even though I can’t see the big picture, He can. Not only that, but He is the artist who created the picture from the beginning. He knows exactly how all the pieces fit.

Heavenly Father,

Thank you, Lord, for your wisdom in not revealing to me the whole picture at once. You give me just a piece at a time and ask me to trust you to make it all fit together the way it is supposed to. Forgive me, Lord, for the times I have resisted when you’ve asked me to move because I want to see and control the way things happen in my life. I know that your plan for me is greater than anything I could do on my own. Help me to trust that you see the big picture and that it will be exactly what you created it to be.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen

 

My anchor

According to ijinmarine.net, the purpose of an anchor is "so that the vessel does not drift unnecessarily from its position due to water currents." An anchor is used to attach a boat or a ship to the solid seabed at the bottom so that the boat cannot be moved by what's going on at the surface. So when the winds blow and the waves pound against it, the boat will stay securely in place because it is firmly connected to the unmovable rock below.

I've recently been a little fascinated by anchors. I think it's very cool to think about how a comparatively small anchor can hold on so tightly to the rock that it can keep a boat many times it's size and weight stationary against all the forces that are trying to move it from it's place. So, I did a little research on how an anchor actually works and I came up with some pretty cool facts. Check them out!

*Most importantly, the anchor must reach all the way to the sea floor to work properly. If it doesn't go all the way down to the bottom, the ship will not be secure.

*Once the anchor is at the bottom, the ship moves in reverse to ensure that the anchor digs in to the seabead. This makes sure it is anchored tightly to the bottom.

*If a ship is not properly anchored, it can be dragged by the wind or the currents and be damaged.

*If the storm is especially fierce, the ship can be dragged despite the strong anchor. During times of rough weather, the ship cannot be left unattended.

*Proper care of the anchor and it's ropes or chains attaching it to the boat must be taken. If the anchor is allowed to get rusty or if the ropes are worn, chances of the boat drifting increase.

This reminds me so much of our relationship with God. In Psalm 18, it says that God is our Rock. He is the constant, solid, foundation at the bottom of our "sea" of life. He never moves despite the wind and the waves and the storms of life that come at us. And the only way for us to stand firm in the midst of all that life hits us with is to be anchored to the Rock.

But sometimes, as much as I try to cling to Him and hold myself steady, the storms of my life are just too strong. I have trouble keeping myself anchored and stable. The winds and the waves come against me and try to pull me away from the place God wants me to stay.

But, thank God, I don't have to do it alone! He has given me a second anchor to help me keep my grip on the Rock. To help me hold steady when the storm is raging. The keep me at peace when the world around me is anything but.

This is her.

My friend, Gina, is an amazing woman. If you know her, I don't have to convince you of that, you see it, too. She is the most self-less, compassionate, giving, unconditionally loving person I have ever met. She is my anchor.

Gina has walked with me through some very hard times, some unbearably difficult storms. She has been there when I have felt unloved, unlovable, insecure, afraid, and invisible. She has talked me through disappointments and discouragements that I thought I couldn't bear.

Not only that, but she has been my cheerleader. She has encouraged me to become the person I was created to be. She has celebrated successes with me and helped me see more inside myself than I ever imagined. Gina has helped me to see myself the way that God sees me.

She is my anchor.

The best thing about my friendship with Gina is that it is and always has been centered and anchored in God. We met at church and our friendship grew through a Bible study we attended together. We study the Word together, we lift one another up in prayer, we seek answers in scripture together. The Bible study group that our friendship grew from is now our ministry. We lead it together. We have prayed, fasted, cried, studied, and rejoiced for it. And through it, our friendship has grown deeper...because it is anchored in the Rock. Gina is always there to speak God's truth and love into my heart.

She is my anchor. 

(did I mention that already?)

As a symbol of our friendship and the way we anchor one another in Christ, Gina and I went a couple of weeks again and got matching tattoos...anchors, of course.

I absolutely love them! They represent our friendship so perfectly! It's our story and our testimony right there on our wrists. And they're more than just anchors, way more. But that story is for another post.

Thank you, Gina, for being my anchor! I love you!

Hebrews 6:19
"We have this hope as an anchor for our soul, firm and secure."

Get rid of the honey!

Although our family eats dinner together every night, lately busyness has kept those dinners from being at our own kitchen table as often as they used to be. But, when we do, you can be sure there is going to be some interesting, somewhat crazy conversation. Our dinner table is rarely calm or quiet, but I like it that way. It's the best time for me to get some awesome, facebook worthy, quotes from my kids. They say the funniest things!

Last night was one of those rare evenings when the kids and I sat down to dinner together at our own kitchen table (and even rarer than that, I am the one who cooked the meal!). It was a nice time of just hanging out together. We talked and laughed and just enjoyed each other's company. A fun time of reconnecting.

At our house, dessert after dinner doesn't happen very often. Usually only if we have guests or it's a special occasion, like a birthday.  The closest we usually come to dessert is when we have biscuits with our meal. The kids will save them to eat with honey at the end of the meal as their dessert.

 Last night was one of those nights. Cheyenne had been waiting through the whole meal for that delicious biscuit and honey. She was so excited about it as she opened up the biscuit, squeezed out more honey than any one person should eat at one time, and picked it up to take a bite.

Just as she was about to put it in her mouth, she stopped. "Eeewww! There's an ant in my honey!"

Now, here's the part of the story I skipped. Last week, we had a similar dinner at our kitchen table. At that meal, we also had biscuits. And at that meal, the kids also wanted biscuits and honey. But, guess what?! Each time someone put honey on their biscuit, they found an ant!

After looking around to see if we could find a source, I concluded that they must somehow have found their way into the honey container and were coming out when they kids squeezed the honey out onto their biscuits. But when the kids inspected the container, they couldn't see any ants on it. They didn't believe me. It looked fine on the outside, no ants to be seen, just beautiful, golden, sweet honey.

So they put it back in the cabinet.

So, last night when I heard Cheyenne say there was an ant on her biscuit, I said, "I tried to tell you they were in the container. You can't see them, but they are there. You need to throw that honey out."

Wouldn't you know, she started to argue with me, at first. Looking at the container, she still couldn't see any ants. The honey looked good from the outside. But when she looked at her plate and saw that little ant, she couldn't deny that it was there. And the only logical conclusion for where it had come from was the honey.

Reluctantly, she threw the honey away.

Isn't that just like us with God? We look at our lives and know something isn't right. We don't have the peace of mind we long for, our finances aren't what we wish they were, we feel overwhelmed by all of the busyness of things we "have" to do, we are stressed and unhappy. There's an ant in our honey.

And, in our hearts, we hear God speaking to us, telling us that we need to get rid of the honey.

Hebrews 12:1 says,
 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,

When I read that, I immediately think of certain "big" sins-stealing, adultery, addictions-and I think I'm okay. I don't have any of those in my life. From the outside, everything looks fine. All anyone can see is beautiful, golden honey.

But then I look deeper. And that's when I find the ants. A little bit of gossip here, a little jealousy there, with some anger and unforgiveness mixed in. Oh, and then there's some discontent and laziness in there as well. Doesn't sound so yummy now, does it?

But the good news is, I don't have to keep that honey with the ants in it! I can throw it out.

Just as disappointment was setting in around my kitchen table because there would be no honey, I told them a secret. I had another jar of honey in the cabinet for them! And this one did not contain any ants!

They were so excited!

And so it is with us. We don't have to settle for that old, ant filled honey because Jesus has brand new honey waiting on us. All we have to do is be willing to throw out the old and accept the new. 

Dear Jesus,
Thank you so much that I don't have to live with ants in my honey. I can live that beautiful, sweet life that I want just by asking you to take away the old and bring me the new. Lord, help me to see the places where I fall short and to give them to you. I want to get rid of anything that holds me back and run the race you have marked out for me. Thank you for your love, mercy, and grace that I can bring my imperfections to you and let you make them perfect. Your unconditional love for me is overwhelming! 
In Your Name,
Amen

 

Attitude is everything...

Sometimes my kids can be so sweet! I love when they do little unexpected things for me like bringing me flowers they've picked from the yard, draw me a picture, do an extra chore without being asked, or say a sincere thank you when I've done something for them. It makes my heart happy to see them go out of their way to be nice. Just now, my Cheyenne just made me an apple with caramel sauce just because she was having one and thought I might like one, too. I love that!

My son, Landon, can be especially sweet. I love all my kiddos, but there is something about a little boy and his mama that is totally different than moms and daughters. He melts my heart. 

Landon can give the most awesome back rubs! He likes to take his little cars and drive them around on my back...so relaxing. I love when he does that! It can put me to sleep in a minute! And I especially love it when he does it spontaneously, just because he loves his mama.

I started to notice a pattern lately, though about when those back rubs would come. It used to be that I would just randomly get one every few days or so. Then, they started to come every day. Then, I noticed that they were coming at about the same time each day...

While the girls were cleaning up the kitchen. 

My sweet son was not coming to do something nice for me, he was pretending to do something nice for me as a cover for him not doing something I asked him to do. He was using a service to me as a way to get out of doing something he didn't want to do. 

As that realization sank in, I no longer viewed his offer to rub my back as a kind gesture, but as an insulting, disappointing action on his part. Instead of making my heart smile, it made my heart sad and hurt. Because it wasn't the action I was so fond of, it was the attitude and the love behind it. Without the love, the action was meaningless.

There's a story in Acts chapter 8 that speaks to how God feels when our actions are motivated by selfish ambitions as well. Acts 8:18-23 says

 

¹⁸ When Simon saw that the Spirit was given at the laying on of the apostles’ hands, he offered them money ¹⁹ and said, “Give me also this ability so that everyone on whom I lay my hands may receive the Holy Spirit.”
²⁰ Peter answered: “May your money perish with you, because you thought you could buy the gift of God with money! ²¹ You have no part or share in this ministry, because your heart is not right before God. ²² Repent of this wickedness and pray to the Lord in the hope that he may forgive you for having such a thought in your heart. ²³ For I see that you are full of bitterness and captive to sin.”

Simon was asking for a seemingly good thing. He wanted to offer the Holy Spirit to those around him. But his motives and his heart weren't right with God. So, his action were not acceptable.

This story was a definite heart check for me. If I am doing the things God has called me to do-tithing, teaching, serving, giving-all good things, but with an attitude of selfishness, obligation, bitterness, or pride, it means nothing. If I do it because I think that I am going to get something from God in return, it is useless. If I serve God only out of fear that He will "get me" if I don't, it's all for nothing. 

God wants our acts of service. He wants our time, our money, our actions. But more than all these things, He wants our heart. 

That's how I want to serve Him today. Not to get anything or get out of anything. Just because I love him. 

Father,

Help me today to check my heart. I want to serve you out of the depth of my love for you, not because of what I think I can get for myself. Forgive me, Lord, for the times my motives haven't been pure. Cleanse my heart of anything that isn't driven by love. I love you and I want my actions to be approved and accepted by you. Thank you for the example of the truest love that you have set for me by sending Your Son, Jesus, to be my savior and redeemer. Help me to love the way you love.

In Jesus' Name, Amen 

Bloom where you're planted

My daughter, Sierra, has a green thumb; something she did not inherit from me. I have one plant that I have been able to keep alive for nearly 5 years, but only because it is one of those almost indestructible and very forgiving plants that just has a very strong will to live.  

Sierra is in charge of caring for all the plants in our house. She waters them each week. She makes sure the dead leaves are removed. She arranges them the way she wants them on the tables. And, under her care, they grow! 

The thing that really amazes me about Sierra's ability to make things grow is that she can get them to grow in unusual places. I've seen her grow things in tin cans and plastic bags (we won't discuss the things that grow under her bed, that's for another post).  Her most recent project was growing beans in an old glass milk bottle. It was pretty cool!

Now, I'm pretty sure that beans weren't naturally designed to grow in old milk bottles in a 10 year-old's bedroom. Bean plants should be outside in a garden, soaking up the rain and dew and sunshine. So, when she first asked me if she could try it, I hesitated. I wasn't sure I wanted to deal with the mess it would make and the disappointment she would have when her little plant didn't grow. But she had her heart set on it, so I gave in.

And, wouldn't you know, the thing grew! It didn't matter if it wasn't the "proper" place for that little seed to grow. When Sierra provided everything the seed needed-water, soil, sunlight-it grew! Right where it was! Not only did it grow a long, beautiful vine, it also grew a little seed pod with new beans inside!!!

The believers in the book of Acts were like that. Acts 8:4 says

"Those who had been scattered preached the word wherever they went."

These believers were being persecuted and scattered from their homes. They left all that was familiar and comfortable and were placed in a new, scary situation. And yet, they chose to do what they were made to do-tell others about the love of Jesus. 

I need to remember this. Even when my circumstances aren't ideal-money is tight, my plans get changed, people don't behave the way I wish they would-God has given me everything I need to thrive. He has planted me there for a purpose and even through it's not what I would choose, He wants me to grow and to do what I was created to do, to "bloom where I'm planted."

So, that's my challenge. Even when things aren't going my way or aren't turning out the way I planned. Even when my circumstances are unfamiliar and scary, I need to look for the opportunity God has placed before me to do what He made me to do-share His love with those around me. He has given me everything I need.

 

Let it go

Do you ever get offended? Get your feelings hurt? Silly question, right? We all get hurt by other people sometimes. People say things they shouldn't or don't say things they should. We get talked about, left out, walked away from, neglected. And it hurts. If we let it, the hurt can bury itself in our hearts and build a wall of hurt and unforgiveness around it. When it does, the bitterness and resentment affects our relationships with other people, with ourselves, and with God.

As a follower of Christ, God tells me to forgive because He forgives me. But what, exactly, does it mean to forgive? Does it just mean the person says, "I'm sorry, " and we say "That's okay" and then never speak of it again? Does it mean that we move on with our lives and never bring it up..until the day we are hurt again and feel the need to rehash our hurts from the past. Doesn't it mean that we put on a smile on the outside but in our hearts still hold onto the hurt and keep our distance so it can't happen again?

No. None of these are true forgiveness.

According to dictionary.com, to forgive means, "to give up all claim on account of; remit." That puts a whole other spin on it, doesn't it. When I forgive someone for hurting me, I give up ALL claim to my hurt, anger, bitterness, and resentment. Even if I feel it is justified. Even if the hurt was intentional. Even if I think holding onto the hurt will help protect me from getting hurt again.I have to let it go!

You know, I find this easy to do as long as the offense is small and the other person is sorry. When my friend says something that hurts my feelings and she apologizes, I can let it go. When someone has made plans with me and cancels at the last minute, I can move on (as long as they give me a valid reason). When my kids take me for granted and later come and thank me for what I've done for them, I can forgive and forget.

But what about when the offense is much, much bigger? What about when someone has deliberately hurt you and caused you pain in a way that can never, ever be taken back? What if they aren't sorry? What if the hurt happened long ago and the person isn't around anymore? How can we forgive when the unthinkable has happened? Do we even have to? Aren't we justified in feeling the way we feel when someone has done something so terrible? When we've been used or abused or unloved or loved in a way that was never meant to be? Do we still have to forgive?

I was reading the final section of the stoning of Stephen and his words spoke to my heart. Acts 7:59-60 says

⁵⁹ As they stoned him, Stephen prayed, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” ⁶⁰ He fell to his knees, shouting, “Lord, don’t charge 
them with this sin!” And with that, he died.

 Wow! These people weren't just talking behind Stephen's back or spreading rumors. They weren't just trying to cause him pain. They were taking his life! They were stoning him to death. Can you imagine the pain of that? Surrounded by a group of people who hate you, being hit with stone after stone thrown by angry men, until you die. If anyone ever had a good reason for unforgiveness, it was Stephen.

And yet, he chose to forgive. Not just to say the words, but to truly forgive and give up all claim to being angry or hurt, even to the point of asking God not to hold their sin against them. Amazing!

And yet, God calls me to do the same. He is asking me to forgive people from my past who have hurt me in ways that never should have happened. He's asking me to release all claim I have to feel hurt or afraid or resentful or angry. To release my claim to hold on to memories and feelings that I use to protect my heart from being hurt again. 

But I can't. Left to my own devices, I can't let it go. I can't truly forgive. There's another verse in the story that tells me the secret to why Stephen was able to forgive these people even as they were ending his life. 

Acts 7:55 says 

⁵⁵ But Stephen, full of the Holy Spirit, gazed steadily into heaven and saw the glory of God, and he saw Jesus standing in the place of honor at God’s right hand.

Stephen's ability to forgive came because he was filled with the Holy Spirit. His power to let it go came from his relationship with God. And that's where our will come from, too. Ask God to help you forgive, even those who have hurt you in indescribable ways. Ask for His spirit inside you to give you the strength to let go of the hurt and grab onto His grace. You will be amazed at what God will do when your heart is free from the past and able to embrace to future God has for you!

Heavenly Father,
Thank you, Lord, for you Spirit living inside me! You give me everything I need. Lord, fill me with your Spirit to the point that I have no room to hold onto my hurts of the past. I want to let go of my unforgiveness for things that happened to me that I cannot change or control. I want to run freely into the future you have for me without the weight of the past holding me back.  I know that I can't do it on my own, but you working through me can free me. I love you and praise you for the work you are doing in my heart to set me free. You are an amazing, loving, gracious God.
In Jesus' Name, Amen 

Yo-yo

Have you ever played with a yo-yo? You hold it in your hand with the string around your finger, then you drop it. You let it fall until it just hits the bottom of the length of the string, and then you yank it back up into your hand again. This is the whole game. Up and down, up and down. You never actually let go of the yo-yo and let it fall, you just let it go as far away from you as possible before you pull it back. 

For a very long time, 36 years, I lived my life believing that's how God worked. I thought he had me on a yo-yo. Good things would happen to me and I would praise God for what He had done. But then something bad or unexpected would happen and I would doubt Him and feel like He had dropped me. I would get to the end of myself and cry out to Him and feel Him pull me back up. I felt like God got great pleasure out of watching me go up and down, up and down. It was a miserable way to live, always waiting for the bottom to fall out and wondering if God was going to catch me this time before I hit the ground.

This summer, I had the opportunity to spend a lot of weeks teaching the 1st-4th grade class at my church while we waited for a new Children's Pastor to come on staff. The curriculum we were using had us studying in the book of Exodus, the story of Moses and the Israelites. I began the unit with the birth of Moses and finished up with Joshua leading the people across the Jordan river into the Promised Land. As I went through the weeks of teaching, a theme kept coming up-"don't forget what God has done for you."

Throughout the story of Moses, God proves over and over that He has a plan for them and that He will provide everything they need. He brought them out of captivity in Egypt and even caused the Egyptians to give them supplies they needed when they left. He parted the Red Sea. He provided water from a Rock. He sent manna from heaven. 

Every time God provided, the Israelites praised Him for what He had done. 

But every time they encountered another obstacle, they forgot. They doubted. They accused God of having them on a yo-yo, of bringing them out of Egypt just to kill them in the desert.

In Stephen's speech to the Sanhedrin in Acts 7, he goes over that same story, beginning with Abraham and following it through to David and Solomon. He then turns the situation back to the people around him and tells them they are just the same.

Acts 7:51 says

  “You stiff-necked people! Your hearts and ears are still uncircumcised. You are just like your ancestors: You always resist the Holy Spirit!"

Ouch! 

I am right there with them! Always accusing God of not having my best interest at heart, of not caring what happens to me until I hit the lowest place. Thinking God takes pleasure in my pain.

But, I have come to understand something...God didn't put me on that yo-yo. I put myself there. It isn't that God drops me and lets me hit bottom. It's that I let go of Him. I try to control my life, my circumstances, my finances, my relationships and do things my way, rather than listening to the things God is speaking to my heart. Then, when it doesn't work out, I blame Him, when all along, He's been speaking to me and showing me how to do things His way, the best way.

What would happen if I let go of the yo-yo mentality? If I stopped seeing my hardships as a time of being dropped by God and started seeing them as being held by Him through it? What if, instead of blaming God for my mistakes and mess-ups, I turned to Him for the answers before I made the decision in the first place? What if instead of doubting when things get hard, I began to praise Him knowing that He has a plan and that He will give me everything I need?

God doesn't take pleasure in my pain. But He does use it. He knows the storms I walk through. He knows my feelings of sadness, disappointment, loneliness, worry, fear.  And He is there. Always holding me. Always speaking to me. He never leaves me. He will hold onto me, but I must choose to hold onto Him as well. 

Heavenly Father, 

Lord, I praise you and I thank you for always holding on to me. So often, I let go of you and try to do things my own way, resisting your Spirit and rebelling against you. Forgive me for those times when I have done my own way, messed up, and then turned and blamed you as if you caused my pain, or even enjoyed it. You ALWAYS have the best prepared for me. I am the one who chooses to settle for less. Help me, beginning today, to let go of my yo-yo mentality and to trust. I know you will never leave me or let me go and I choose to hold on to you as well. Thank you for loving me and for never giving up on me!

In Jesus' Name, Amen

Words

If you've been reading my blog very long, you already know that I am on a mission to read the entire Bible for the first time in my life. As I read more, I am continuously amazed. The stories I've heard since I was a child suddenly come to life for me and speak to me in a way they never have before. And there are so many things that I've never read or heard before! I  love it!

One of those stories that came to life for me was the story of Stephen in Acts. I have heard mention so many times of Stephen being a martyr, of Stephen being stoned. But I had never really heard the story in detail. It's an amazing story!

In my Bible, the story of the stoning of Stephen is divided into three sections-"Stephen Seized", "Stephen's Speech to the Sanhedrin", and "The Stoning of Stephen". As I read this story, there was something from each section that spoke to my heart that I would like to share with you. So, we'll divide his story into three posts.

Ready? Go!

Acts 6:8-15 is the story of Stephen being seized. 

⁸ Now Stephen, a man full of God’s grace and power, performed great wonders and signs among the people. ⁹ Opposition arose, however, from members of the Synagogue of the Freedmen (as it was called)—Jews of Cyrene and Alexandria as well as the provinces of Cilicia and Asia—who began to argue with Stephen. ¹⁰ But they could not stand up against the wisdom the Spirit gave him as he spoke.

¹¹ Then they secretly persuaded some men to say, “We have heard Stephen speak blasphemous words against Moses and against God.”

¹² So they stirred up the people and the elders and the teachers of the law. They seized Stephen and brought him before the Sanhedrin. ¹³ They produced false witnesses, who testified, “This fellow never stops speaking against this holy place and against the law. ¹⁴ For we have heard him say that this Jesus of Nazareth will destroy this place and change the customs Moses handed down to us.”

¹⁵ All who were sitting in the Sanhedrin looked intently at Stephen, and they saw that his face was like the face of an angel.

 Two things about that really stick out to me. First off, it says Stephen was " a man full of God's grace and power," and then it says, "But they couldn't stand up against the wisdom the Spirit gave him as he spoke." Wow! Stephen was so filled with God's Spirit that his words were words of wisdom that no one could fault. I want to be like that!

God has given me the gift of words. I love the written word, the spoken word, song lyrics, poetry, anything with words. Words are so powerful! Words have ability to build someone up or to instantly tear them down. Words in songs and poetry can speak to someone in a way that pierces their defensive walls and goes straight to the heart. Written words are especially powerful for me. Something about seeing the words on the page or on the screen helps me to take it in and hold onto it in a way that just hearing it doesn't. Guess that's why I like to write so much.

But even knowing this love of words was a gift from God, I chose to sit on it for a long time. I have always been afraid to share what I write with other people. Having people read what I had written, even in a card or letter, was so scary to me. I was scared people would somehow make fun of it or point out the flaws in it to me. And especially when it came to writing about Spiritual things. What if I told someone wrong? What if I misquoted or misunderstood what the Bible said? What if I totally messed up the meaning of something?

But I have come to realize something. By MY power, my words mean nothing. Even through my best effort, my words are flawed and meaningless. I try to speak words of wisdom and advice to people by my strength and I fall short every time.

But when I first come to God and ask Him to speak through me, my words can be powerful. My words can be full of wisdom and hope. They can be words of healing and encouragement. They can be words of enlightenment and understanding. But they're not really my words at all. When I come to God and ask Him to speak through me, He does, and the words are His.

So, my aim is to be like Stephen. To be filled be filled with God's grace and power and to speak the words the Spirit gives me. And I know God will bless it and use it to speak to someone else. 

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for this love of words that you have placed in my soul. It is a gift from you and I want to use it to bring you honor and glory. I ask that the words I write and the words I speak not be mine, Lord, but yours. Help me to be filled with your power and your grace so that your words of wisdom flow out of me. Bless those who read my words. Speak through me into their hearts. I praise you for the way you are using the gift you placed in me to reach other people You are an amazing, wonderful God!

In Jesus' Name, Amen

Waiting on tables

In my house, the kids outnumber the adults, 2 to 1. There are four of them and two of us. The odds are pretty much in their favor. And since I have a husband who works out of town a lot, the odds most days are actually 4 to 1.

Four children in the house makes for lots and lots of messes, cooking, and laundry. My washing machine runs at least 3-4 loads a day and my dishwasher runs twice just to keep up with our needs. There are constantly school books, shoes, toys, electronics, and various other things lying around that need to be picked up to keep our home from becoming a disaster zone.

Add to that all of the other "life" things that have to happen on a daily basis-homeschooling (a job all by itself), driving the kids to and from their activities, church, Bible study, caring for our animals, paying the bills, shopping for groceries, planning the meals-and life can quickly become overwhelming for me. I am only one person and I can only do so much.

That's why, in my house, the children have chores. They are responsible for a big part of the cooking, cleaning, and animal care. They help do the laundry and clean the van. They dust and vacuum and do the dishes. And it is a tremendous help to me.

Because they take care of those kinds of chores that pretty much anyone can do, my time is freed up to spend on the things that only I can do.

Only I can drive them places they need to go (for a few more months anyway). Only I can plan our homeschool lessons and calendar to keep us on track. Only I can do the bills and the shopping. Only I can fill my spot as a Children's Ministry volunteer at church. Only I can write this blog.

I let the kids do what anyone can do, so I can focus on what only I can do.

There's a story in Acts that speaks to this idea within the early church. Acts 6:1-7 says

" In those days when the number of disciples was increasing, the Hellenistic Jews^[a] among them complained against the Hebraic Jews because their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food. ² So the Twelve gathered all the disciples together and said, “It would not be right for us to neglect the ministry of the word of God in order to wait on tables. ³ Brothers and sisters, choose seven men from among you who are known to be full of the Spirit and wisdom. We will turn this responsibility over to them ⁴ and will give our attention to prayer and the ministry of the word.”

⁵ This proposal pleased the whole group. They chose Stephen, a man full of faith and of the Holy Spirit; also Philip, Procorus, Nicanor, Timon, Parmenas, and Nicolas from Antioch, a convert to Judaism. ⁶ They presented these men to the apostles, who prayed and laid their hands on them.
⁷ So the word of God spread. The number of disciples in Jerusalem increased rapidly, and a large number of priests became obedient to the faith."

When I read this passage, I can't help but think of the Pastors and staff at my church. God has called them to be the leaders of our congregation. With that comes huge responsibility for things only they can do. Only they can oversee the day-to-day operations of the church. Only they can prepare and share the messages that God places in their hearts for our adults, youth, and children's services. Only the Pastors can counsel people who need God's love and wisdom in their lives. Only the Pastors can be, well, Pastors.

That's why volunteers in the church are so important.
 I haven't been called or equipped to preach a sermon to the congregation on Sunday morning. But, I am able to sit next to a child in our 1-4 grade class and help them focus on the lesson.

 I can't lead the worship service or play an instrument, but I can help prepare snacks for the little ones.

I can't teach a men's Bible study on Wednesday evenings, but I can help set up the chairs.

I can't spend my days in the church office counseling people, but I can greet people at the doors before service and make them feel at home in our church. 

I can't prepare and teach the service in the Children's Ministry class, but I can help prepare the craft or clean up afterward so that the Children's Pastor has time to prepare the message and her heart.

I can do what anyone can do so they can do what only they can do.

Can you imagine what we could accomplish if everyone did this? Our ministries in our churches would be unstoppable! 

Will you join me? What can you volunteer for in your church that will help the Pastors do what only they can do?

Teach a class?

Set up for chairs for a small group?

Cut out pieces for the Children's Ministry craft?

 Serve as a greeter to welcome new guests to your church?

Whatever it is, I challenge you to jump in and do it. You might be surprised at the difference it makes!

The Rock

Have you ever had one of those days where just about everything seems to be going wrong? Maybe nothing especially catastrophic, but just tons and tons of little things all at once, that all add up to be one giant bad day? Oh my goodness, I have lived there this week! I can't remember a week (except maybe the week my dad passed away) so full of intense emotion and ups and downs. Like a roller coaster. There have been moments of intense joy and moments of fear and sadness. It's definitely been crazy.

Yesterday was the climax of it all. Every time I turned around, there was some little something that didn't work the way I needed it to or didn't happen the way I planned. Things broke, I forgot things, I did things I didn't mean to do. I spent a lot of time on some things I hadn't planned to be doing and ran out of time for the things I really needed to do. 

For a control-freak like me, it was the recipe for disaster. 

But yesterday was different. 

Yesterday afternoon, I had a chance to spend some time with a friend. As we were talking about the events of my day, she said, "I'm proud to see that you're still smiling." I hadn't really thought about it much until then, but I was still smiling. Even with a broken, leaky washing machine and a repair bill I didn't expect. Even with a flat tire. Even with a phone call about lab results from the doctor that weren't what I wanted to hear. Even with technology that didn't work the way I wanted. Even when I spent two hours working on a Bible study only to find out I'd been in the wrong book the whole time. And even when I had so many interruptions to my morning that I didn't get to do one bit of schoolwork with my kids.

I was smiling. 

I was supposed to study 1 Corinthians 7 yesterday morning. But instead, somehow I ended up in Matthew 7. I did the first 3 1/2 sections before I realized what I had done. So, I went back and did the right section and decided to leave the rest of Matthew 7 for today. And this morning, as I was finishing up the last part of Matthew 7, I found the reason I could have such a crummy day and still come out smiling at the end.

Matthew 7:25 says, 

 ^"The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock."

I have learned that no matter what happens to me, my foundation is on Jesus. So, even when things go wrong and life is out of my control, I can stand. He will not let me fall!